I am thinking this is why things like project plans and to-do-lists are so useful. We are renovating and the things to be done just kept whirling around in my brain and making me feel tired. Then our inhouse project manager swept it all into an excel spreasheet like a muster dog getting the cattle penned.
Oh the relief !
We didn't necessarily have all the answers but at least we had documented the questions, in order of when they needed to be decided/tasks needed to be done. I love this explanation Magdalena!
Dear Fi: just reading it makes me tired (lol) and yes, you are so right - we don't need to have all the answers, or solve all the things, we just need to get them "out" of our head to make space! cheering you on with all your projects!
Dear Vinay: now that this is "out of your head" as step 0, consider step 1 and just press the button - seems way to simple and easy, but sometimes we completely ignore easy and simple things and get attached to very complicated systems. Cheering you on, and I'm sure that your clients will love your proposal. Imagine in your mind's eye - when they receive it, they open it and they are trilled with the solution you came up for them and so looking to work with you! M
My "unresolved thing" is that I am waiting for the publisher to send me the formatted pages of my upcoming book for me to approve. I am concerned that there might be mistakes that need to be corrected, but they have told me, "any changes will cost you £570." So I'm stressed about that. Slightly stressed and unresolved that I have a writing workshop tomorrow, and I'm worried hardly anyone will show up, and it won't be worth my time to do it. Yet, I know some people have committed to coming. I just want it to be resolved and over.
Dear Rose: that's a lot of "things/worries" that are happening at the same time. I do hope that getting it "out" of your head crated some space for being able to focus on your workshop tomorrow. Cheering you on and I'm sure that your workshop will be a success and your participants will get immense value! M
Thank you so much Magdalena. This will be the second workshop, and the participants are all sweet, so I'm sure I can "cook up" something useful for them. It's more the book that has been an ongoing situation. And I do mean "ongoing"! Time marches on, and I suppose we are making progress, but it doesn't feel like it yet. Maybe because I don't know how many other steps there are still to go!
Dear Sharon: thank you for taking the step 0, and getting it out of your proverbial chest. Now, consider 30 seconds for step 1: reach out to 1 and see what happens....cheering you on and can't wait to hear about your experience...and what the person said when you reached out! M
This is a brilliant diagnosis of the feeling of cognitive load. The way you connect the Zeigarnik effect to that constant "hum" of unfinished business is a perfect description of the symptom so many high-achievers live with daily.
The question this raises for me is: what if the individual unresolved task isn't the real problem?
What if the real "open loop" the brain can't close is the STORY that makes us believe we are the sole person responsible for all of it?
Cognitive load doesn't only come from a long to-do list. It comes from the energetic weight of inhabiting a story that says, "If I don't hold this all together, everything falls apart." It's the story of the Over-Responsible Achiever.
Writing down the task might quiet the alarm for a moment. But dissolving the story that casts you as the designated alarm-hearer in the first place... that's how you unplug the whole system.
The problem isn't the mental load. It's the story that makes the load yours to carry.
I am thinking this is why things like project plans and to-do-lists are so useful. We are renovating and the things to be done just kept whirling around in my brain and making me feel tired. Then our inhouse project manager swept it all into an excel spreasheet like a muster dog getting the cattle penned.
Oh the relief !
We didn't necessarily have all the answers but at least we had documented the questions, in order of when they needed to be decided/tasks needed to be done. I love this explanation Magdalena!
Dear Fi: just reading it makes me tired (lol) and yes, you are so right - we don't need to have all the answers, or solve all the things, we just need to get them "out" of our head to make space! cheering you on with all your projects!
Proposal that need to be sent out to clients
Dear Vinay: now that this is "out of your head" as step 0, consider step 1 and just press the button - seems way to simple and easy, but sometimes we completely ignore easy and simple things and get attached to very complicated systems. Cheering you on, and I'm sure that your clients will love your proposal. Imagine in your mind's eye - when they receive it, they open it and they are trilled with the solution you came up for them and so looking to work with you! M
Thx for cheering me on
You very welcome!
My "unresolved thing" is that I am waiting for the publisher to send me the formatted pages of my upcoming book for me to approve. I am concerned that there might be mistakes that need to be corrected, but they have told me, "any changes will cost you £570." So I'm stressed about that. Slightly stressed and unresolved that I have a writing workshop tomorrow, and I'm worried hardly anyone will show up, and it won't be worth my time to do it. Yet, I know some people have committed to coming. I just want it to be resolved and over.
Dear Rose: that's a lot of "things/worries" that are happening at the same time. I do hope that getting it "out" of your head crated some space for being able to focus on your workshop tomorrow. Cheering you on and I'm sure that your workshop will be a success and your participants will get immense value! M
Thank you so much Magdalena. This will be the second workshop, and the participants are all sweet, so I'm sure I can "cook up" something useful for them. It's more the book that has been an ongoing situation. And I do mean "ongoing"! Time marches on, and I suppose we are making progress, but it doesn't feel like it yet. Maybe because I don't know how many other steps there are still to go!
M I like your clarity and the way you open new ways of seeing things that then seem obvious ❤️
Dear Linda: thank you for your kind and supportive words! I'm so glad that you find it valuable!
Thank you.
There are several relationships I would like to deepen, yet I keep putting off reaching out waiting for the "perfect" time.
Dear Sharon: thank you for taking the step 0, and getting it out of your proverbial chest. Now, consider 30 seconds for step 1: reach out to 1 and see what happens....cheering you on and can't wait to hear about your experience...and what the person said when you reached out! M
This is a brilliant diagnosis of the feeling of cognitive load. The way you connect the Zeigarnik effect to that constant "hum" of unfinished business is a perfect description of the symptom so many high-achievers live with daily.
The question this raises for me is: what if the individual unresolved task isn't the real problem?
What if the real "open loop" the brain can't close is the STORY that makes us believe we are the sole person responsible for all of it?
Cognitive load doesn't only come from a long to-do list. It comes from the energetic weight of inhabiting a story that says, "If I don't hold this all together, everything falls apart." It's the story of the Over-Responsible Achiever.
Writing down the task might quiet the alarm for a moment. But dissolving the story that casts you as the designated alarm-hearer in the first place... that's how you unplug the whole system.
The problem isn't the mental load. It's the story that makes the load yours to carry.
We are awaiting a decision from a parole board. Hopefully, they start my son's case early in the day...
Deciding whether to take a risk of vulnerability by asking a new acquaintance for a small favor regarding my job search